A crazy amount of change has been happening…and the real challenge for me has to do with staying in that energetic state of mind that is my LEARNING ZONE.
I am discovering the point where I can flip over into my panic zone straight out of my learning zone without notice and without drawing breath.
For me the trigger is a feeling of ‘not good enough’. My ‘not good enough’ manifests as panic, rigidity and downright shut down.
When I manage to stay in my Learning Zone – that is the zone that is outside my comfort zone, that stretches me and grows me – I get to reap the benefits: excitement, aliveness, anticipation, and mostly flexibility. When I flip over and find myself out in terror-tory I can easily sink into panic – like being at the door of a perfectly good plane with no parachute on my back – no thanks.
The I-ching this month talks about not forcing and perhaps allowing a change to emerge and being ‘flexible’ enough to allow a change in a conviction. This for me this is key to helping me navigate back to my learning zone. Sometimes it’s as easy – and as hard – as asking the right question.
Last week I was locked out of my emails….my life line. I was not able to get onto ‘the system’ so I was not able to complete what I perceived as my work for the week. I admit to a few very stressful and panic moments. Feelings of helplessness, frustration and well, I’m sure you can all recognise that…I was in reaction most of the time. When I finally found some space from my panic, and asked myself: “I wonder what I can learn from this, why is this be happening now?” I realised that I needed some space to take a breath. It was like a gift – if I could have seen it. Ok, you need a few days off – here you go! What a shame that I didn't see that earlier and relax into something I couldn’t change anyway. What a waste of energy really that I could have channeled into chill-out!
There is an adage that we never change unless we HAVE to. Something will inevitably come along to force our hand and make us move in some direction. I think in this time of major upheavals on the planet, it might be time to take back that power, and bring in some proactiveness. I have decided that I need to really change my reactive nature in the face of not feeling good enough. I ‘know’ that my best IS good enough, so I choose to change. I have a choice where I choose to live; in my comfort zone where life is safe, easy and slightly boring; in my panic terror-tory where life is stressful, anxious and frustrating or in my learning zone where life is challenging, slightly risky and edgy, exciting and alive. If the question that I ask is: where am I living now in this moment? What is my answer? Am I in choice and I allowing myself an attitude of flexibility of conviction? If I can choose learning, I can choose…I am in choice…I am in the driver’s seat.